Droplets

What happens when everything you have worked so hard for is questioned by those you thought it never would be?  It's easy to lose yourself in your surroundings - whether it be a joyous place, or a somber place.  You eventually become one with your environment - or, rather, that's the theory.  Many people decide they'd rather stand apart from their environment than become a homologous being in the surroundings.  But I don't see it that way.  I think...you can become one with your surroundings without becoming homologous with the world.  Think about it - if a wall contains twenty photographs, each different, certainly one could deduce that the surroundings were indeed different.  Add another photo, however, and it becomes one with the environment of the room.  It blends while remaining itself.  If only that was always the case, however.  


I fear...I fear that my surroundings may begin to mold me.  I have worked to hard to get where I am.  To who I am.  Certainly I wish to become one with my surroundings, but I do not wish to become like everyone else around me.  I do not want to be molded to be just like everyone I am aquainted with.  Not even if it is what my friends expect of me.  But what then?  How far does one go for friends?


I suppose it's like a simple titration.  You can add a differently colored chemical to a base in droplets, and they will quickly fade away - the base remains the same color and the chemical characteristics, for the most part, remain unchanged.  After a certain number of drops, however, the base is no longer what it once was.  The color has changed.  The characteristics have morphed or changed in ways that may or may not be known.  


I don't want to be that base.